Growing Through Books
If you’re a book lover like myself and many others, then you understand the impact of a good book. Whether it be a novel that takes you on a fantastical adventure or a biography that makes you look at a public figure in a new light, a stack of well-thought-out pages is all it takes to spark a change in you. I am certainly not the most well-read woman in the world or someone who always has a book in her hand, but I deeply love and appreciate books as they are a direct source of never-ending knowledge and escapism.
Over my 25 years, I have read numerous fictional books that engrossed me to the point I would skip meals just so I didn’t have to put the book down, these are books that most would scoff at (The Twilight Saga) but I adored them. When I started University I found more of an interest in non-fiction than I did in my usual stories, with the book Factfulness: Ten Reasons We're Wrong About the World – and Why Things Are Better Than You Think by Hans Rosling, kicking off my drive to constantly search for information. When I realized that I could learn more from a book I picked up at the store than I did from any of my government-issued school books, it was as if a switch flipped and I wanted all the books, on every topic that interested me and I haven’t been able to stop since.
The following three books are those that have had the biggest impact on me to date. These works have changed the way I view life and death and have all been rated 5 stars on my personal Good Reads.
Brief Answers to the Big Questions
By Stephen Hawking
Though I’ll never be able to write a blurb worthy of Stephen Hawking, I’ll do my best. One of the easiest books to digest given its contents, Brief Answers to the Big Questions gives you easy-to-understand factual statements. While other books in this genre have been written overly complicated to make you feel as though your native tongue, is not your first language, Hawking clearly explains in layman's terms his answers to the 10 questions he covers in this book. The questions range from one many have pondered at some point in life “Is there a god?” to others on time travel and whether or not there is life elsewhere in the universe.
Before reading, you may think of this book as a textbook in disguise, do not be fooled. The overall theme is that of Hawking’s belief in the balance of nature and humanity. He argues humans are setting themselves up for failure and that only science can save us from our mistakes. With overpopulation creating the need for increased energy and food production, destruction of our natural environment, and income disparity, all of which create a recipe for disaster. Hawking argues these existential obstacles are potentially solvable we just need the time and resources to do so.
For me, this book balanced complex topics with comprehensible answers and created an emotional reaction throughout its entirety. I wasn’t only learning, I was gaining a deeper understanding of the world around me and what it meant to be human.
You can read a previous review I wrote about Brief Answers to the Big Questions here: Link.
Disclaimer: I wrote this review when I was still in university… don’t judge it too hard.
The Body Keeps the Score: Mind, brain and body in the transformation of trauma
By Bessel Van Der Kolk, M.D.
This book came into my life because of my degree in psychology. I was looking for outside reading and came across it at Waterstones as it was one of the popular trending science books. It has never failed to be my first recommendation for anyone interested in psychology or self-help. If you’re on the sensitive side, as I am, this book can be a difficult read. From the very beginning, the reader is taken on an emotional rollercoaster and it’s made clear, if it were not already evident by our reality, just how cruel humans can be to one another.
The Body Keeps the Score dives deep into the unfiltered traumatic experiences of patients and the often debilitating after-effects of that trauma. Author Bessel Van Der Kolk not only discusses the experiences of victims, he also touches on those of the abuser. The raw and emotional accounts throughout may help give a better understanding of what breeds cruelty among humans, whilst opening pathways of understanding that there is life after trauma. Personally, The Body Keeps the Score helped me understand a lot of what was going on in my own body and mind at a time before I found a trauma specialist. It showed me that others have gone through equally horrible events and then some, yet they are capable of coming out on the other side. It gave me the extra push I needed to get better and heal properly for my and my future’s sake.
If it were not for this book, I don’t believe I would have had the knowledge necessary to find the right help, or have the belief that there is the right help.
Smoke Gets In Your Eyes: & Other Lessons from the Crematory
By Caitlin Doughty
Smoke Gets in Your Eyes: & Other Lessons from the Crematory - Caitlin Doughty
If death is a difficult subject matter for you, and you’re hoping to get past that someday. Start here. Smoke Gets in Your Eyes is (so far) the most touching and heartfelt work I’ve read about a topic so macabre. Caitlin Doughty has a writing style that is so down to Earth and funny it made the bizarre experience of reading about sweeping bones and ashes out of machines easier to process but did not come across as apathetic or insensitive. Throughout the book, she shares details of her daily life working in a funeral home and how her past experiences led to this unusual career choice.
It’s usually not my cup of tea to entertain topics that can be so gruesome, but it was a much-needed practice in exposure therapy, one I don’t regret or am haunted by. Caitlin’s way of speaking about death and the deceased made it feel less foreign and terrifying than I initially believed. Our ancestors and modern humans of other cultures see their dead in their natural state, why do we (in America and other Western countries) hide them away and polish them up? It’s as if we believe that if they don’t ‘look dead’ then they’re not. Then we can fool ourselves into believing they’re not gone.
By the end of the memoir, I felt more at ease with the concept of death and the author’s desire for Western society to change the way we look at death and handle our deceased’s funeral care. It never occurred to me, just how shielded the majority of us are from what death looks like. Once you’re able to push past the initial fear and uncertainty that is our inevitable expiring, you open the door to freedom and gain the ability to truly savor the precious accident that is life, and along with that comes the ability to fully mourn our loved ones.
Now that I’ve shared these three writings that have had such a massive impact on my life, let me introduce you to the following list that I believe is essential to every bookshelf.
The Hunter-Gatherer's Guide to the 21st Century - Heather & Brett Heying
Note: My takeaway is that not all scientific/societal advancements are helpful or progressive. This was a thought I never gave much attention to until after reading this book, now I constantly ask myself, is my modern solution to this problem really necessary?
The Gut Stuff - Lisa Macfarlane & Alana Macfarlane
Letters From an Astrophysicist - Neil Degrasse Tyson
Behave: The Biology of Humans at Our Best and Worst - Robert Sapolsky
Note: If you want a deeper understanding of humanity and society this is an absolute must-read! I learned more from this book than I did in a lot of uni classes.
The Brain: The Story of You - David Eagleman
Note: An easier-to-read alternative for Behave: The Biology of Humans at Our Best and Worst, for the psychology newcomer.
Why We Sleep - Matthew Walker
Note: If I were to have allowed a 4th spot on my life-changing list this book would have been there. It has changed the way I live my life and sparked my strong interest in sleep science. I always recommend this book to anyone looking to live a healthier life. You can read my previous review of it here.
